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Sunday, September 30, 2007

vexel part 2

so today i tried doin vexel again. as usual,i gave up half way cos it was too tedious lah. haha. im so far away from my goal. but its hard to truly give up doing it especially i havent done a single complete piece. insyallah..i'll try again. haha. here's my pathetic piece!

here's the real deal which i know i'll never achieve.

Friday, September 28, 2007

vexels

so today i tried doing vexels again. hhahaha. if only i was hardworking in productive things. too bad. i cant study but im better at practical hands on crap. oh yah..i was too lazy to finish it up. so i gave up half way. how usual of me huh! do click on the pics to see a clear large pic.

the original pic

all that ive done.

a real vexel by the professional

fuck. im so far away from my goal. hahaha!

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

so shitty

she's like the newborn baby of the family.
she always gets to do this and that.
eventhough she may seemed nice,she seemed harmful in my eyes.
fuck shit!
momma always treats her like her baby
buy this for her.
give her that.
what about me?
am i old news?
why is she being pampered but i haf to be treated differently?
me too wants the same treatment!!!

Tuesday, September 18, 2007

urgh

good things should only happen to good people!

thats right! i know i have been doing good but i dun get it why that assholes always seems to get his way. tis simply spoils my mood for the day. that spoil son of a gun should go to hell for all his sins. i hate him. and there's no where else for me to let out my feelings. so dun get mad at me for posting this out.

lately,ive been feeling all emotional due to the monthly trauma that we women get. yup,menses! all the hormones change and the ever sensitive me. but wait! i did thought tis through,i din let my emotions get the worst of me. but i know,i have the right to feel this way for all the things he did to me. wait wait!! let me get this clear, i aint mad at my man. thats one thing for sure. what an irony from the mushy entry previously. haha!

ok back to these spoilt son of a gun. he gets every freaking things that he wants. he hits whoever god damn person that he hates. and if he dun get what he wants,he just shows a fucked up attitude and again,his wishes will be fulfilled. urghh! where the hell did fairness went? i swear if that kid was my son,i sure will give him a good old beating cos that's way over my limit. i seriously dun get why they always fulfill his wishes yet blame him for behaving that way. reflect people!! u give in to him all the time,how the hell does he knows his limit when u all give in to whatever he desire. there's no boundary for him,as u let him do whatever he wants.

right! continue doing all his demands. i guarantee u,in time to come,u'll be a slave for him. thats one thing for sure. for now,ure simply a fool to him. one that he cant make use of.i may be an outsider,but from where ive come from...i know what these simple priviledges he already gets,can harm a child. to be honest,my mom has taught me so much. yes, she may have made a lot of mistakes. but i certainly agree that her style is the most beneficial for any child.
she do not pampers me,she train me up to be independent and be easily adaptable to difficult situations.

yeap,its my mummy alright. i may argue with her ways at times,but to know ive grown so much from all of this,im proud.im so proud to say im a strong independent child who do knows my boundary. i respect my elders eventhough i may sound mean at times. but for one thing,i realise i tend to say things out of anger. gosh! for now i really hope something could be done with that spoilt brat. i dun wanna reach a point in time where i just be gone from there all because of him. and u guys should stop saying "he's just a kid". so does that mean its okay for him to act like an asshole? till his 50s than u guys wanna train him issit? dun ever spoil ur child as its only putting more burden to u urself.

Monday, September 17, 2007

love

its late but im still online using baby's lappy. im exhausted but somehow my eyes refuse to rest. not yet though.

its already the fasting month and this to me just sucks. i feel like im so far away from baby despite him being with me almost 24hours a day. maybe im being paranoid here. but heck,im longing for his touch. the way he kisses me suddenly when im asleep,the way he hold me tight when we're sleeping or when we kiss ever so passionately when the lift door closes. not being to do most of these things just makes it all weird. its like having him but not being able to enjoy him as it is. and this itself is making me a lil grumpy as the days goes by. arghh! how pathetic huh?! i miss my baby and i miss our usual moments. the fasting month is sure a tough month for me. no vulgarities,no fast foods in the afternoon or even no afternoon snacking with baby. all this has been a part of my life and it sure is hell trying to not do all of these.
whatever it is,i love my babyboy.
i love how he smile at me everytime we meet.
i love how he kisses my hand when its time to say goodbye.
i love how he looks annoyed every time im late.
i love his patience in dealing me as i know im tough to handle.
i love how he tries to comply my every demand when deep down,his stressing about money.
i love how he force himself to massage my back when he himself is in pain.
in short,i love how he sacrifice so much for me..
I LOVE YOU,SHUKOR NOORDIN!!

went to school for econs paper today.
it was monday and crap,the additional school song.
stand still as the command was given
my mind was back in wonderland when suddenly, there was this strong disgusting smell
it couldnt have been me cos i swear i took a bath every time.
furthermore,i wore deodorant and 2sprays of perfume.
so i must be smelling perfectly fine?
my nose began investigating despite knowing that it was a torture.
sure enough,it was from this fat ugly chinese guy.
he was bringing in the poison
fark it lah. what a thing to begin my week with.urghH!
he smell like he didnt took a bath for almost a month
i almost vomited as a stood beside him
in fact,i felt like telling him off
does he realise his sucha nuisance with that odour? gosh!!

so after paper,ayu called. this is how it goes:

ayu: u having menses ar?
me: yah,y huh?
ayu: aiyah,thought of going swimming with u. its my off day today leh
me: huh? today? i got plans with him leh. his off day liao
ayu: i noe its his off day lah
me: eh? how u noe?
ayu:cos i his scandal wat?!~
me: fuck u lah.
ayu:nolah,i call him lah since u never pick up my calls
............
ayu:so going anot?
me : sorry ar girl,cannot make it lah. sory yah
ayu: alaa,everytime i busy,u all look for me. but when i free,u all busy!
me: sory lah. next time k
ayu: kla klah...bye ar bye arr!
me: oh..oklor. bubbye
ayu: ur head lah. then bastard? i upset here,never comfort me one ar?
me: oh i have to huh?
ayu: yalah...

...

so thats how it goes. ended up spending time with baby. sory girl, next time k sayang. nanti aku blanja kau bubble tea lah k. aahahha!